From Feburary 14th, 2008:
After Mark dropped me off from the dinner, I called my mum to tell her Mark and i were getting married. But we waited a few days before the announcement was made.
Mark had mid-terms that week and I wanted to wait for mark to tell his parents.
Frankly, I knew he was working up the nerve; they weren't going to take this bit of news well.
So the morning of Chemo, after Mark told his Dad, I called my mum and gave her the go ahead to to tell others. And I am sure the phone lines were burning because that was news she had been dying to hear and tell. Then, we told the staff. No big shock there either. Except for those who thought we were already married.
The day after Chemo was Friday and as usual we got together to have Shabbath supper before we went to the Temple.
Mark started asking me is rapid form: what type of wedding did I wish, where did I want to go on a honeymoon, where did I want to live, how many children did I want.....
I just looked at him in shock. Who are you and what did you do with my Markie. The cold feet had totality defrost and I now had Groomzilla on my hands!
Amoung the questions was my engagement ring. Mark asked if I had any ideas or just trust him. I have always wanted to pick out my own ring, so it was decided I would go with him. But until then, I wore his class ring from West Point. But we had to put tape in the center because the ring was too big for my ring.
Friday night Mark went to tell Rabbi: "Rabbi! We did it! We are engaged!:Rabbi said "Mazol Tov! Did you tell Laini?"
For you see, Mark's announment sounded like he had told me we were getting married: it didn't sound like he had asked me.
One sister (who wasn't at the dinner) when I told we were engaged I had to catch before she fainted; she was ready to shout and start dancing in the aisles. I told her that Mark wanted to wait until the next morning to make the announcement.So, just before the end of the service, Mark made the announcement we were engaged.
Part of his statement was: "I always thought I would chose my wife; but G-d found her for me."
Now this goes against our western concept of love and marriage. In Biblical times and even now in observe homes, it was the parents that arranged their children's marriages. In our faith, just as G-d brought Adam to Adam (her name wasn't Eve then) so we trust G-d as our Abba to find and bring us our spouse. And since we both sought G-d as to who to marry, our Heavenly Abba brought us together. Yes, there were a few who thought Mark was saying; "G-d told me to marry this woman and he did."
Well, G-d did tell Mark I was the one for him. But G-d gives wonderful gifts. We ask His guidance for jobs, schools, cars. Why not the person your suppose to spend the rest of your life with? Why not pray for one of the most important descision in one's life?
I remember the look upon his face when he sat down. He was in shock. That "I set my course and I can't turn back" look.
I was beginning to wonder if I should let him off the hook and give him back his class ring......